105 Ways to Give a Book

First Day of Spring My Ass

I just want it known that I have officially had it. I am done with winter. Done, I tell you. I had sworn to many people that I was boycotting the whole winter thing by putting away my sweaters and heavy coat, and I didn’t care how cold I got in my three-quarter-sleeve button-up shirts from Old Navy.

Hah, winter — your move.

Freaking snow.

Nicely played, winter. Nicely played.

My move? Weak, and yet at the same time decisive. A little book spring cleaning took place last week. (Did you hear me winter? Last week!) In my book spring cleaning I returned:
  • An Idiot Girl’s Christmas by Laurie Notaro
    Would have been funnier at Xmas.

  • Easier Than You Think, by Richard Carlson
    Yeah, that’s what you say.

  • Clutter’s Last Stand, by Don Aslett
    Clutter is bad. Repeat concept 413 times.

  • Leon and the Champion Chip, by Kurzweil
    Kids’ book. Failed to engage.

  • Girl in a Cage, by Yolen
    Not what you think. Couldn’t get into it. (The book, not the cage.)

  • Sex with Kings, by Eleanor Herman
    Exactly what you think, but not as interesting as you would think.

  • The Bush Dyslexicon, by Mark Crispin Miller
    Bush says things funny and we elected him. Too ticked to read this book.

  • Time Management, by Marshall Cook
    I wanted to keep this, but couldn’t resist the irony of returning it unread.
There you have it. My book spring cleaning is done and now I am going to wash all the drapes or wax the tabletops or whatever else I have to do to prove that spring has begun. And no snow is going to change my mind.

1 comment:

CW said...

Motherreader, you rock.

I found you through your comments on my dear friend Korilu's blog. I've read a few of your posts and I am hooked. I particularly like what you had to say about the (nonexistent) gay penguin agenda. ;)

I will keep reading!