105 Ways to Give a Book

Happy Holidays From MotherReader (and Stephen Colbert)

I know that some of you are starting your vacations for the holidays. Me, I’ll be here, adding a few posts in the next two weeks — including the Annual Airing of the Grievances on Festivus, December 23rd. Do stop by and vent freely. For now, what better way to start off the holiday vacations than with videos from Stephen Colbert?

The first is clearly a song — a duet, in fact — but there is so much poetry in it that I’m making it my Poetry Friday entry.
There are cynics, there are skeptics
There are legions of dispassionate dyspeptics
Who regard this time of year as a maudlin insincere
Cheezy crass commercial travesty of all that we hold dear

When they think that, well, I can hear it
But I pity them their lack of Christmas spirit
For in a world like ours, take it from Stephen
There are much worse things to believe in

A redeemer and a savior
An obese man giving toys for good behavior
The faith in what might be
And the hope that we might see
The answer to all sorrow in a box beneath the tree

Find them foolish, sentimental
Well you’re clearly none too bright, so we’ll be gentle
Don’t even try to start vaguely conceivin’
Of all much worse things to believe in

Believe in the judgment, believe in Jihad
Believe in a thousand variations on a dark and spiteful god
You’ve got your money, you’ve got your power
You’ve got your science saying the planet’s going to end within the hour
You’ve got your dreams that don’t come true
You’ve got the ones that do

Then you’ve got your nothing
Some folks believe in nothing
But if you believe in nothing
Then what’s to keep the nothing from coming for you?

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year
Now if you’ll forgive me there’s a lot to do here
There are stockings still unhung
Colored lights I haven’t strung
And a one-man four-part Christmas carol waiting to be sung

Call me silly, call me sappy
Call me many things, the first of which is happy

You doubt, but you’re sad
I don’t, but I’m glad
I guess we’re even
At least that’s what I believe in
And there are much worse things

And with Hanukkah starting this weekend, let’s hear a little bit from Jon Stewart. My favorite part can’t be called poetry, but it makes me laugh every time.
Jon: I can’t interest you in Hanukkah?
   Just a little bit?

Stephen: No thanks, I’ll pass.
   I’ll keep Jesus, you keep your potato pancakes.
   But I hope that you enjoy ’em
   On behalf of all of the goyim

Jon: Be sure to tell the Pontiff
   My people say Good Yontif

Stephen: That’s exactly what I’ll do

Both: Happy holidays, you...

Jon: ...too!      Stephen: ...Jew!


Anonymous said...

Happy Holidays to you, we're starting a little early today with school closing early due to snow.

Sherrie Petersen said...

Those are fun poems for a Friday :) Happy holidays to you too!

EM said...

We have taken in our house to finding every excuse to say "candles," so that the hearer can respond, "What are they?" and the candle-mentioner can reply, "THEY ARE CANDLES!" Hee hee.

Happy holidays!

Little Willow said...

Good times, good times.

Vivian Mahoney said...

Happy Holidays!